How to Reparent Yourself: Inner Child Healing and Emotional Wellness for BIPOC Women

Summer has a way of inviting us to slow down. The days stretch longer, the pace of life softens, and many of us find ourselves with more space—emotionally and physically. But slowing down can bring unexpected feelings to the surface. For those navigating attachment wounds or childhood trauma, quieter seasons may offer a unique opportunity: the chance to reconnect with, and care for, your inner child.

This gentle, transformative process is called reparenting—and it’s one of the most powerful forms of self-healing you can engage in.

What is Reparenting?

Reparenting is the process of giving yourself the support, structure, compassion, and care you may not have consistently received in childhood. Whether due to neglect, emotional inconsistency, generational trauma, or survival parenting, many of us carry unmet emotional needs into adulthood.

As clinical psychologist and racial trauma expert Dr. Mariel Buquè says:

“Reparenting is the journey of coming home to yourself. It’s about tending to the parts of you that were neglected, dismissed, or harmed—and choosing to care for them with love.”

When we reparent ourselves, we’re not erasing the past—we’re creating a more nurturing and secure present.

Why the Inner Child Needs Care

If your early caregivers were emotionally unavailable, critical, overwhelmed, or unsafe, your nervous system likely adapted to survive—not thrive. You may have learned to suppress emotions, over-function, people-please, or disconnect entirely from your body.

But those parts of you—the parts that needed to be comforted, protected, and seen—never truly disappear. They often live inside us as our inner child, still seeking the safety and care they were once denied.

When we reparent ourselves, we’re not trying to rewrite the past. We’re simply choosing to meet ourselves in the present with the care we’ve always deserved.

Summer as a Portal for Healing

Slower seasons like summer can be the perfect time to engage in this work. With fewer demands and more opportunities for reflection, you may find it easier to listen to your inner world.

Use this time not just to rest, but to reconnect. Healing doesn’t always require grand gestures—it often begins with small, intentional moments of softness.

Gentle Reparenting Practices to Try This Summer

Here are a few ways you can begin to nurture your inner child and provide the emotional care you may have missed:

1- Name Your Needs Without Judgment

Ask yourself: What do I need right now?

Then listen—with curiosity, not criticism. Maybe it’s a nap. Maybe it’s a hug. Maybe it’s to cry or laugh or dance or sit in silence. Naming your needs is a way of telling your inner child, “I see you.”

2. Create a Soothing Routine

Predictability creates safety. Try setting a small daily rhythm—a morning ritual, an afternoon walk, or a bedtime wind-down—that signals to your nervous system that it’s safe to slow down.

3. Revisit Joyful Moments from Childhood

What made you feel free or joyful as a child? Blowing bubbles? Drawing with chalk? Watching your favorite show? Bring one of those moments into your present day. Joy is healing, too.

4. Speak Kindly to Yourself

The way you talk to yourself matters. Practice using words that are gentle, affirming, and forgiving. Try writing or repeating phrases like:

• “You didn’t deserve what happened.”

• “You are safe with me now.”

• “I’m proud of how far you’ve come.”

5. Let Rest Be a Form of Repair

Your inner child is not lazy—they’re tired. Tired of performing. Tired of striving. Tired of holding everything together. Rest isn’t a reward for productivity—it’s a return to wholeness.

You’re Not Alone on This Journey

Reparenting can bring up big emotions, especially if you were taught to ignore or invalidate your own feelings. You may notice resistance, grief, or even guilt. That’s okay. Healing is rarely linear.

At Wellness Tree Counseling, we specialize in helping individuals unpack attachment wounds and rediscover their sense of self with compassion and care. Whether you're just beginning your journey or deep in the process of healing, we’re here to support you.

Let’s Take This Journey Together

This summer, give yourself permission to slow down—not just to rest, but to reconnect with the parts of you still waiting to be seen. You are worthy of the care you offer to others.

Schedule a free intake screening to explore how therapy can support your reparenting journey. Visit www.wellnesstreecounseling.com to learn more about our services.

You don’t have to go back in time to heal—you just have to show up for yourself now.